Saturday, 5 September 2009

The Day The Super L*****s Went To School

It was a Friday, it was a gloomy Friday; it was yesterday.

Friday 0650 HOURS LOCATION: CENDAWANS SEX 6 SUBJECT: 3 SUPER LANCAUs PREPARING TO GO TO THE COLLEGE

I have to be frank with you, today, I too am a SL. And here is the reason why.

It is the fasting month, and muslims are encouraged to sahur, or have a meal before fasting. Due to lack of resources, I had to turn to a packet of Mamee Tomyam (instant noodles) for my sahur.

For those who no usually indulge themselves with spicy foods, well... Eating spicy foods on an empty stomach causes, what Malaysians call, chiritus-beeritus @ cirit-birit in non-sceintific lingo. Dayarea is the English word for it. Just Kidding lol Diarrhoea; is the word.

Well, at 06500 +8GMT, Friday, I was hit by this fatal symptom. (did u know Diarrhoea kills appx. 2.2million children through dehydration? Ha, amik kau. Bet u didnt kno that kot.

My gang and I were all ready to go / to depart to The College, when I got that feeling. It was The Cirit Gods whom have sent their blessing. It was time. Time for me to cirit lol.

So I said to my friend Kamil (1) There are 2 kamils
"Weh, can u wait for me kejap? (kejap = a while), I wanna take a light shit (not mentioning that my shit was the cirit kind)."

So I sat in the toilet. BUT, it wasnt any other toilet, it was MY toilet. And let me tell you something about that toilet... IT WAS DARK AS... ntah.. Dark as (google kejap)DARK AS A DUNGEON!!

Menatang starter bilik tandas aku rosak; the starter of my pendafluor light was screwed, and so sometimes the light "masturbated" or blink-blinks, (kelip-kelip). But on that Friday morning, it didn't blink, it just... Remained powerless, joule-less, and so it did not light up, for even a milisecond.

AND SO, in a nutshell, I had to sit in a dark toilet, for some 2 or 3 minutes, whilst having to withstand the smell of cirit-birit @ diarrhoea, in the dark.

When I came out, I told the other my SCARY experience. Here is the dialogue (in malay)

Ko tau, aku berak tadi, da la gelap. Pastu cirit plak aku alami. Ko tau macam apa, macam duduk dalam burit raksaksa ko tau. Gelap, berbau, pastu cam.. suasana panas-panas
(
You know, my shit just now, WTF. It was dark, then like.. Its like sitting in the Assh*ole of a Monster! The stench, the darkness.. and the warmth)

Shortly after that we all trodded to the College, end.

2 comments:

farhanahizani said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Anonymous said...

fi, i just figured it out; your muse tnggal dlm toilet!!! same r kite bro, hahaa~

sincerely,
godpleasestopthisguyfrombeinggay

see the boxes at the bottom (of the post) ? Tick one if you have the time. Because if the genre is disliked, similar posts won't be done. thanks. btw fuck nuffnang.