Tuesday, 26 October 2010

300

We are 300 Strong.

This is not the first time i reached 300 posts. Every once in a while i delete old posts, or new posts, because they offend people.

So if you want to read really shitty work by a great mind, this will most probably be the last day.

By the way, i just failed two more tests.

I can see a bright future for myself. Working at kedai lampu at seksyen 9 dekat sebelah that Kari Kepala Ikan shop. A bright future indeed.

Here's a quote. Give a man a fish, he will eat for a day. Teach him to fish, he will eat for a lifetime.

See, how there are actually quotes out there which stick in your head, and theyre education related quotes, not stupid quotes like, oh i donno, love bla bla bla bullshit. And motivation bullshit.And other stuff.

When will we for once, write some EYE OPENING and INSPIRING bullshit, rather than just diary or rant based bullshit. Write stuff which make people think twice about killing themselves, that would be great.

Reminder to all: Learn to fish.

Sunday, 24 October 2010

Skype Again

i think the creator or editor of skype is a friend of mine

and not only is he a friend, but also a chinese friend

i have plenty of those i think

anyway, here is the proof


see the first line
"calling phones ah lot?"
i think he wanted to spell a to AH

like
oi lot, calling phones ah?

like that la...  see... correct kan..i don't think other people get this 60% offer... its like he knew me... then approached me and all.. you know... offered me la.. in private

its also my friend cus usually spammers je which spell names with Capital Front letter... like hey Lot

Tuesday, 12 October 2010

A Cat is Much More Than A Cat

So I used to have this really stupid cat. But now, the cat is not so stupid. It no longer shits behind the TV set. It has become a normal cat.

My mother and I don't have anything in common, except when i told her to look after the cat when i'm gone.

So i said to my mum
"bila lot pergi Sekolah (college), mami tolong tengokkan kucing ni eh?"

and my mum, like all mothers to their most manja-d son, will nod.
The thing is, my mum has an allergy towards furry animals.(towards fur in truth)

And in case you didn't notice, cats aren't exactly FUR-less. They have fur. And my cat, likes going into the house, to ask for food.

Now, everytime i go back, my mum, who used to not let me have a cat, will say
"kucing lot da pandai buat kawan! dia kawan dengan kucing Kelabu Mr. Lim"

Then i'd say 
"memang ma! tu boyfriend dia... dia dah tak lepak kat rumah dah.. dia pergi dating"

All this while, i was looking for a missing connection with my mum. I tried helping her cook, and i tried going out with her more often for dinner. But the cat really did it for me. We can have a normal conversation, now that the cat bonds us.

She not only looks after my cat, but also Ginger, my other cat which i stole from my neighbour. =D

I don't know whether this is just a fake relationship or what not, but it feels nice. And i think it is.

And everytime i see my once-stupid cat guling guling on the lantai, while waiting for me to give it food, i remember how such a stupid thing can work wonders

Monday, 11 October 2010

Air Nescafe Itu Manis

The year is 2007. perhaps the most unproductive year in my life, besides 2009. 


anyway, the water cooler is 4 floors below. it is 1 a.m. And i, as the master of Coffeemix and Nescafe, am making a dangerous concoction of 2 Mild 3 in 1s, tonight.


so after 114 steps to the water cooler, i have finally produced a fine blend of coffee. and it smells nice. and it tastes nice. and its not too warm. and not too hot. and not too sweet, and not too bitter. i would say, it was the perfect cup of coffee.


so then, i climb 114 steps back up, to the darkest of the dark rooms, my room. and i sit on my tak beralas punya bed, and start to sip the cup of perfection.


the warmth was much like the warmth you feel when pissing in a swimming pool on a cold day, it was, overwhelming. not only was the coffee warming the tongue, but it sort of warms your body, much like your urine in the swimming pool.


then, like pokemon the Red Version:
a wild Palat has appeared!


Palat "asks for coffee!"


then the Palat took a sip from my cup of Perfection.


Palat says "your Coffee is not nice. its too cold. it tastes like Taik Kelawar"


I'm like. Dude. The coffee isnt for you. i climbed 114 steps and went down another 114 steps to take the hot water to make that. Its like. Come on la.


'aku ni sensitif orangnya' 'jagala hati aku man' . come on la bro. i went a long way to make that coffee, for my self. then u 'pao' me, then u dont have the decency to at least give some positive comments on the coffee that i made.


sesungguhnya, hati ini terluka ah. 


picnochio malam ni pujuk aku ; )

Monday, 4 October 2010

CAR 92

guess what

what

yesterday i saw a car, and guess what the plate number was

what was the plate number thing

it was CAR 92!
oh gila la weh?!

who would have guessed it. a car, with the plate CAR. now you dont see that everyday do you. unless you are the owner of that CAR, get it? not car, but CAR cus its the license plate number.

anyway, people are fond of borrowing cars from people who have cars. that is a fact.and so, on this beautiful sunday morning, someone asked me if they could borrow my car. i asked them where they wanted to go.

because i am a human. thus i am curious. then he told me

"oh, i am going out with my best friend"

yeah, that doesnt really answer my question. so i asked them again, kau nak pergi mana?

"aku nak klua dgn ahmad"

yeah, again, i know ahmad is your best friend. but WHERE, wo, mana, are you, going?

"takpela"

then, he signed out. he didnt have the courtesy to call me in the first place. he used the shittiest chat system in the world, FACEBOOK chat.

its not that i want to be a jerk, its just that, i dont like the idea of someone going JUNGLE TREKKING with my car. or travelling to MELAKA to take something they left during the holidays. young drivers nowadays are VERY inexperienced. last thing i want is him going to TAMAN NEGARA with my car. so just answer the question.

WHERE

ARE

YOu

Going

la

babi
see the boxes at the bottom (of the post) ? Tick one if you have the time. Because if the genre is disliked, similar posts won't be done. thanks. btw fuck nuffnang.